The little things that matter in any relationship

Thank you readers for sending across your ideas and questions for my blog posts. I will be answering them in my upcoming posts, so do stay in touch.

Most of you know that I celebrated my birthday few days ago and if you’re someone who knows me personally, then you’ll vouch for my love for birthdays. I absolutely love to celebrate my birthday, in the traditional way. I cut a cake and accept gifts too! However this was not the case few years ago. I hated my birthday and never celebrated it until I was 12 years old. If you’ve watched my story, you’ll know the reason for the same.

My life and perceptions changed when my step-mom (Chithi) entered my life. She believed that birthdays are a beautiful reminder of how lucky we are to be born as a human being. Every year she bought a new outfit for me, we visited the temple to thank the almighty for this wonderful healthy life and then we enjoyed the delicious food my Chithi prepared. It was a little ritual that I started loving and gradually I started celebrating this special day of my life.

“Sometimes,' said Pooh, 'the smallest things take up the most room in your heart.”- A.A Milne

She took so much effort for me. She never brought me an expensive gift, but the time we spent chatting about the different aspects of life, those moments are etched in my memory forever. There’s a beautiful quote that reminds me that it’s the little things that matter when it comes to create a wonderful relationship.

“Sometimes,’ said Pooh, ‘the smallest things take up the most room in your heart.”- A.A Milne

In today’s post I would like to share few little things that you can do to keep a relation alive and blossoming. Do note that this works for all the relationships.

  1. Take care of yourself:

I’m sure all of us have heard this, “You can’t pour from an empty cup.” It’s so true, isn’t it? A relationship is about sharing a part of your life with the other person and that’s where it is highly important to take care of yourself. Watch out for your emotional, physical and mental health. When you’re awesome inside, it shows on the outside. In the initial days of my marriage, I remained quiet and on days when I spoke with my husband, we ended up fighting. Slowly I noticed that our relationship was not growing. The reason I realised was I never loved myself and when I didn’t love myself, how was I supposed to receive love and express my love for him.

I will discuss more about this in a separate post, but for now stay healthy and love yourself.

2. Remember their special days:

This is a habit we all must cultivate if we want to strengthen our relationship. Birthdays, anniversaries and special days like Mother’s day, Father’s Day, Teacher’s day and Friendship day do remember them. If you feel that you can’t remember them, then use technology, set an alarm or  write the important dates in a diary. Wishing people on their special days, make them feel loved and wanted. Trust me that’s the best feeling in the world.

3. Gift them something:

This one is my personal favourite. Gifts need not be expensive like a diamond ring or mobile phone (but you can gift those too!) A simple home cooked meal or a dinner at their favourite restaurant. Even a cup of tea works well for moms. Buying books, favourite gadgets or even spending an evening playing video games with your spouse works wonders. Some people love handmade gifts and if you can make a greeting or something exclusively for them, then it’s an icing on the cake. I love the thought behind sending a gift. I appreciate the time taken to actually buy or make a gift. I’ve a treasure chest of handmade cards, letters and other little gifts I’ve received in all these years.

4. Show in your actions:

“Actions speak louder than words” It’s so true when it comes to relationships. A hug, a smile, a compliment, few words of encouragement…they do wonders. I make it a point to hug my daughter everyday at least 10 to 20 times. Each time I hug her, I remind her how special she is and how lucky I am to have her in my life. This is something I missed in my childhood days. I longed to be cuddled by my mother so I make sure that my daughter gets her daily dose of hugs.

5. Spend time:

“When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you’ll never get back. Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give someone is your time”- Rick Warren

Time is the most valuable gift you can give the other person in a relationship. I don’t remember my Appa and Chithi giving me expensive gifts, but they both spent time with me- a lot of time. On weekends Appa and I discussed about books, writing and new authors. He introduced me to the Speaking Tree section of Times of India and to this date, I enjoy reading that column. Chithi introduced me to the power of prayer and she told me stories from her childhood. We never watched TV while having meal and I treasured this precious time we spent together.

6. Switch off the virtual world:

One night few years ago I was busy chatting with a school friend on Facebook, Swapnil was the admin of his school WhatsApp group and he was busy adding his friends on the group. My 5-yo daughter commented, “I so wish I also had a phone, so I can talk to someone.” Her comment pricked my heart and I decided to never use mobile in front of her. If it’s really important, I tell her, “It’s an important email and I’ve to reply. Give me 15 or 20 minutes and I will speak to you.”

Social media has become an important tool to stay connected, however I  feel that it’s good to connect personally with your loved ones. Once you reach home, switch off the Wi-Fi and plug into the real world and trust me it’s AWESOME!


So there you know some really interesting and simple ways to strength a relationship. Do you follow any of these, if yes I would like hear more about it. If you have any other tips, then do share them with me, I would like to try those.

Hope you’re having a peaceful and relaxed or an adventurous Sunday with your loved ones. See you tomorrow with yet another post.

Love and gratitude,


5 thoughts on “The little things that matter in any relationship

  1. Gayu! You’ve played a special part in my life and I have preserved our whats app interaction. Today, I am slowly seeing the results, right from the meditation part and to imagine life as a film, to see positive things in life. Yes! You’ve been an inspiration, little Goddess. I learn something new in this post and what a special way.

    1. Thank you so much Vishal for such kind words. Yes I remember that conversation and I can also see the results blossoming 🙂 Continue to prosper and learn my dear blog buddy. A world full of opportunities await you 🙂
      Stay blessed!

  2. Another lovely post!

    Belated birthday wishes to you!

    I personally don’t like celebrating my birthday. I won’t mind if nobody wishes me on my birthday (Once when I was in school, nobody wished me on my birthday. Maybe, because it was Durga Puja time, so everyone forgot about my birthday :))

    Very thoughtful and important points here. You have to act wisely when it comes to relationships. Just I’m kind of addicted to internet, and can’t switch off completely 🙂 but, yes I do make time for my dear ones, and that is important, right? 🙂

    1. I too was addicted to internet…but now I feel little relaxed when I switch off the virtual world for sometime. The constant feeds kid of drains my energy. It’s a good shift 🙂 Thank you for reading and sharing 🙂
      Love and gratitude,

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