Love, it changes everything!

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”- Lao Tzu

Love changes us in unimaginable ways. It makes us do things that once looked scary. It transforms things around us and something very deeply within us.

I can vouch for this.

It was a warm afternoon in the month of April 2004, when Swapnil Aptekar entered my life. Little did I know that his love for me will change everything about me, even my name. The journey from Jayashree Iyer to Gayatri Aptekar was tough, yet incredible.

I started eating vegetables like bitter gourd and dill leaves while he happily experimented Chinese cuisine. He started wearing causal-wear and I wore the colour ‘Orange’. He joined my reading club and I blissfully accompanied him on early morning walks. He started watching South Indian movies and I enjoyed Hollywood action & drama.

He organized his wardrobe, while I took interest in gardening. He learnt to prepare tea, just the way I like it and I learnt to meditate and embrace silence.




Our love for travel took us to beautiful places and he discovered joy in photography. He started to stay up late on nights when I wanted to talk and I joined his 5am club, happily.

Together we learnt to give each other space and focused on polishing our talents.

Above all, he loved my strengths and I learnt to love myself with all my flaws.

That’s the transformational power of love, it changes every single thing about us, beautifully! If you’re blessed with a loved one, hold on to them and express your love. You don’t need an expensive diamond ring or an exotic vacation to show your love. Sometimes a cup of tea, a song, a smile, a hug, a compliment, a love note or a message is enough!

How has love changed you? I would love to hear your stories in the comment box.

Love and Gratitude,



2 thoughts on “Love, it changes everything!

  1. Years ago I remember a cousin telling me – when she was telling her mom that a love marriage made more sense – it seems her mom (my aunt) told her – “Oh well – we too had a love marriage. Only the love came after marriage. That’s all”!
    That is so true in my case too. Having had an arranged marriage, where after our engagement I did not hear from my fiance at all, I thought I would forget his face! And then he called. And then he wrote a letter (we were in different cities). For three months we wrote to each other and learned about each other. He thoughtfully drew a family tree of his side in one letter! And so before we got married I knew most of his family 🙂
    Soon after we got married and before we actually went to Calcutta where he resided, he told me several little things about his neighbourhood – all seemingly insignificant, but when I reached there everything felt very familiar. Looking back I think this was so important when a 20 year old bride leaves her home and goes to an absolutely new city!

    Over the years – now 40 full years of marriage, love has blossomed in so many ways *in spite of* the inevitable fights / differences that can crop up in a marriage

    Gifts / surprises are all a part of the fun of love. But I truly think that it is in the very difficult times that it shows so deeply. When my mom died and it meant that I had lost both parents, for the first couple of months, he kept on watching me and taking care, to see that I would heal. Still earlier when I was ill once and hospitalized, he was my pillar of strength. And again when I was ill recently, the amount of care that he took of me was incredible. I was not exactly terribly sick, actually moving about etc, but ill enough not to be able to do much. The stupid situation of not being too ill and not being well enough. Thanks to him I managed to have the patience to get thru!

    The BEST thing he recently did for me was to book a business class ticket to the US and back, when I had to go for a conference. This was his 60th bday gift to me!! I did not even realize it while he was planning it and when light struck my brain, I was all melted 🙂 🙂

    I sometimes actually wonder if I can match the love and care he showers on me. But I guess if I write all this in utter gratitude, I can and I do!

    Thank you Gayatri for this opportunity to write – coming out of your blog post. God bless you and all your family

    1. Thank you Vasu for such a lovely comment. I will cherish this story forever. 40 years of marriage, wow! that’s precious. I love the way you share these stories with me. You know how much I love listening to them. I can already see your eyes sparkling 🙂 Meet me soon…I want to listen to more such heart-warming stories.
      God bless both of you with good health and many more amazing & memorable moments.

      Love & hugs,

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